7 Crime-Fighting Grandmas You Don’t Want to Mess With


Grandmas are usually old and frail, but when push comes to shove, they can turn into merciless war machines. Next time you think to yourself, “Eh, it’s just an old lady. What is she going to do about it?” please refer to this gallery of badass grandmas.

Despite their old age or fragile stature, these ladies are tough as nails and could probably handle any unprepared assailant.

1. Elaine Gallaway (73 years old)

Do not mess with grandmas at Canadian Wal-Marts. They see everything and won’t let you escape with whatever it is that you’ve shoplifted. Unless you give them a cut of the loot, but that’s a really awkward and risky conversation. Either way, that’s pretty much what happened to Elaine Gallaway and a masked robber stealing food. She noticed him doing something shady and then stopped him at the checkout when the bad boy was trying to run off with a whole shopping cart full of stuff.

2. Marcia Black (75 years old)

Nobody likes car thieves. Real life is not GTA V, so you can’t just steal someone’s car, get chased by the police, and then try to hide in an old lady’s house, especially when that old lady is rocking a hunting rifle and telling you to get off her property. The fool thought she was bluffing. Well, she wasn’t. While the commotion was happening, Marcia’s grandkids called 911. When the police arrived, the guy took off into the woods but was quickly apprehended.

3. Pauline Jacobi (92 years old)

Pauline Jacobi’s story is as heart-warming as it is unbelievable, but we’ll trust her this time. One day after shopping at a local Wal-Mart, Pauline was about to be mugged guy a guy named Ricky. He allegedly threatened granny with a gun and asked for the wallet, but Pauline refused, saying that she was not afraid to die as heaven was waiting for her, unlike Ricky, who would probably go to hell. This preachy message allegedly got through to the mugger, and he started crying. After a brief conversation, he kissed Pauline on the cheek and left with the ten bucks she gave him.

4. Unnamed Queensland Grandma

One fine evening, an unknown grandma was celebrating her birthday at a local tavern when suddenly a man ran up to her and snatched her purse. The poor lad had no idea who he was dealing with. The lady caught up to the robber in a second and put him in a chokehold. After wrestling for a bit, she tore off his shirt and got her purse back. That’s what you get for disturbing grandma’s night out!

5. Clarese Gainey (65 years old)

What would you do if a large dude wearing nothing but underwear started breaking into your car? 65-year-old Clarese Gainey saw that exact picture outside her window, and she knew she had to handle it the old-school way — with a well-placed smack on the head. The robber was high on cocaine, but even that didn’t help with all that pain from a baseball bat hit. The Florida man didn’t know that Clarese used to be a softball player, so she could swing like a pro even in her old age.

6. Willie Murphy (82 years old)

Here’s a scenario: you are a tough burglar breaking into a poor elderly woman’s house, but after smashing the door, you get hit with a table, then blinded by shampoo, and smacked with a broomstick until the cops and ambulance arrive. Sounds like an episode from a TV show, but this actually happened to a house robber who was unfortunate enough to break into the 82-year-old bodybuilder’s house. In the end, she felt so sorry for him that she didn’t even press charges.

7. Judy Memmel

When in Texas, you have to assume that everyone’s a badass, otherwise a regular grandmother opening a jewelry store in the morning will take you by surprise. Judy Memmel shoved an armed man outside the door without even skipping a beat. Meanwhile, one of her co-workers hit the panic button and alerted the police. The failed robber fled the scene and was never seen there again.